He disabled his match.com account in front of me
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
So here's a brief summary of my weekend: last night I drank four glasses of Death Punch, grabbed the toaster, said "This is mine", put it in my pants and walked out the front door.
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
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