You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
Randomize
