i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
40s are totally the cure
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
Randomize
