speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
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