I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
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