i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
Rumble strips road head = magical
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
Randomize
