first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
Randomize
