We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
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