What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
Randomize
