is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
Randomize
