:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
Randomize
