I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
I wanna passion pit in your ass
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
Such a big mess for such a small penis
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
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