How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize
