Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
I don't know when it is this year, but if I ever text you an illegible text that also happens to contain sharks, Shark Week started.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
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