I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
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