it wasn't lemon gatorade
its not stalking. its research.
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
Randomize
