Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
Randomize
