Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
Last night my friend tried to make out with me in an olive garden. Ahahah
Nothing says 'I love you' like never ending salad and breadsticks
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
I just slammed another champagne, swaggered over to her, pointed across the room at the 20 y/o lacrosse player and whispered loudly, "I brought that one for YOU." I'm getting a raise.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
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