Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
This is the prime rib incident all over again
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
I just cut open the plastic package of a Plan B pill using the bottle opener I carry in my purse. #whyidrink
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
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