So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
Also, ran into my neighbor across the street. He told me about scheduling his vasectomy. We are officially way beyond the acceptable point for asking his name again.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
we're so committed to being not committed
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
Randomize