didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
I kiss like a newly born barfing kangaroo
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
