i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
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