My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
Randomize