this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
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