i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
Randomize
