Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
Please don't give away my fajitas
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
Randomize
