Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
i came on her dog
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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