So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
Randomize
