Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
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