Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
I'm paying a homeless guy $20 to follow me around bars tonight with a boombox playing the theme to Rocky.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
Randomize
