real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
Also you know what's irritating? When the guy you're sleeping with refuses to like any of your Instagram posts
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
Randomize
