I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
Randomize
