and my herpes radar will keep us safe
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
Randomize
