Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
it glows. i had to have it.
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
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