I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
He called his prostate his "boner button".
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
Randomize