Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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