I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Randomize
