fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
I rang in the new year by giving a lap dance to a Lutheran minister in a roomful of people including his wife. Jesus would be proud.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
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