apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
Randomize
