No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
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