In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
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