Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
im calling her cock vulture from now on
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Randomize
