What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
Randomize
