In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize
