I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
I am one with the molecules
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Randomize
