you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize
