Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
Randomize
