i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
I can't make this stuff up. Your ex is singing I Will Survive on the karaoke.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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