So I'm eating my burger minding my own business, when the guy next to me starts up a conversation. Seemed normal at first, stocks, bonds, etc...then he said...and I quote "I can push a bowling-ball up a flight of stairs with my tongue." As I awkwardly laughed he broke out "I bet you I could bite the head off of a rabbit."
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
I have aggressive nipples.
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
