she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
Randomize